Our life begins with this.

Last night I walked to the bank and I ran into a remarkably drunk and very old german woman named Linda. I tried to follow her 3/4 german 1/4 english story she was telling me but somehow I just ended up dancing with her in the street while she told me about how her husband looks like St. Nikolaus and they both love Michael Jackson. It was a great time.

Today was my last day of Lecture Phase.

Tomorrow I get to see my favorite face in the whole world. 

17 days and I'll be living in Africa for 3 months.

Christmas morning I'm going to wake up in a hostel with Nicky Hackett and seven other random people I've never met before. Yessss.

I had to pick the hostel we were staying at... it was between Letum Sleep 7, Three Little Pigs Hostel, or The Pegasus Hostel. I went for Pegasus. 

I'll tell you how it goes! Merry Christmas :-)

How am I not myself?

How am I not myself?

How am I not myself?

How am I not myself?

Today someone asked me, 

So really, who are you? Who is Joanna. Tell me about you...her... Would I like her? What does she love? What is she passionate about? What makes her angry? What's her story? What does she want?

I had no idea what to say.

If I am not myself, who will be me?
But, if I am only myself, what am I?
And if not now, when?

Thirteen more days

So I have like 27 different paths I could take at the moment.

I really make things hard for myself sometimes. Three months from now, who knows. Whatever?

Other than that, I've been having some great times. My meals mainly consist of spicy pringles and German energy drinks, my weekends lately are photoshoots and Star Wars marathons. 

This weekend, I got lost in Berthelsdorf looking for the christmas market, and we tried to ask some cute old germans where it was, I tried to make some hand motions of...buying things... and they were like Ohh! The Disco? So yeah that was a failure. 

But it was St. Nickolaus day so I got some candy in my shoes when I woke up, which makes any day better.

We had a 24 hour of prayer weekend for our photo outreaches and it was so amazing. I signed up for mostly absurd hours in the morning and while I was in the prayer room laying on the ground with my Bible on my head, I heard God's voice clearer than ever before in my life. I can't wait to find out what He has planned for Ethiopia. I'm getting so excited. Shiza.

Oh, and it snowed.

Sighisoara

Thanks to the incredibly random man that saved all the pictures I deleted from my memory card. 

God is awesome.

We stayed in Budapest two nights. I mean... really. I have never felt so drawn to place. 

If Europe and the Middle East had a baby, it would look just like Budapest. I was so intrigued

 by everything about the Hungarian culture and I really don't think thats the last time I'll be there.

SO then we drove a million hours through rain and fog to get to Medias, Romania.

The staff at the YWAM base there are so amazing. Walking in that place I suddenly felt like I was in the middle of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, which is really just a great feeling. Romanians are so crazy and I loved every second I got to spend with them. 

Being a missionary in that place would be incredibly difficult. Romania has pain and poverty everywhere you look and you can physically feel it driving through the country. Even all the weird Dracula history has had a visible effect on the country and there are a lot of demonic strongholds there.

There is a lot of racism against gypsy people, a lot of orphans begging on the streets, and ridiculous amounts of prostitution... Parents even encouraging their daughters to go into it because of the money. Its really insane. 

We spent a lot of time just praying with them and for their country, we led worship for the base in the mornings and I think it really encouraged them. They really need people to go to Romania and live there long term, to be on staff, to help them, to just be a light there. It was so cool to hear the stories of the YWAM staff in Romania, many of them were orphans on street, little gypsy kids, they have incredible stories of finding God and how they are now living to help the kids that are like they were see Him too. 

We walked around and had worship in a ghetto of a gypsy town and it was a really beautiful and hard moment. 

Some of the gypsy kids in the neighborhood came up and held our hands as we walked through. The YWAM staff told us about the kids that come to the school they started, and how snack time there is the only time the kids get to eat some days. One guy had told us about the growth of prostitution and about the two men that had started it in that town, then showed us the house those men lived in, and we walked by one of them with one of the girls. Hearing about prostitution and how awful it is and how the girls are treated is one thing, but then walking by the girl, the man, seeing the house it happens in, that will never leave you. 

One thing I wonder is how to tell people these things. I don't know how to help the people I've met other than to pray for them, to talk about them, to ask God to send more people to help them. I just feel a lot of responsibility to do something about what I've seen.

How do you show someone the terrible things of the world and then ask them to go there? Its hard, its pretty much impossible without God moving in them first. 

I hope someday I will be able to have the right words to express the beauty that is in the most hopeless places, the glory of God that is in the eyes of a prostitute, and be able to tell their stories in a way that's worthy of them. 

Transylvania

I've gotten so lazy

at writing blogs

and doing things

I went to 5 countries last week, and I would like to show you the pictures, but I deleted my entire memory card like a moron. 

But God is so awesome and He can use me even when I mess everything up, and a random guy came up to me and told me he could recover all my files. So when I get them, you guys will be the first to know.

It was a hard week in Romania, we traveled a long way to do what felt like not very much, but God used us to encourage the missionaries there and pray for them as much as possible. They have the hardest job I could ever imagine. 

I got to hug some gypsy children and have worship in a gypsy ghetto in the city that Dracula was supposedly born in.  and Josiah even pierced one of the orphans on the street's ear.

It was a beautiful week of my life, I think I'm going to be thinking about it for few years before I understand it.

Tribe of Death

I heard an amazing South African man speak today. 

He doesn't say 'Welcome to Christianity'

he says 'Welcome to the Tribe of Death'

Where we die everyday.

So many things are happening to me.

Suddenly everything has become incredibly serious.

Don't be

      afraid

       discouraged

       silent

I am with you

Acts 17:9

Joshua 1:9

Isaiah 54:4

Only with God is it possible to feel renewed and energized after pouring out everything I am and have.

This post is real long

I went to a mosque with a group from the base. 

We actually met with the Imam and it was a really tough experience. He really knew what to say to shut down our questions but we prayed a lot and it was good to be there discussing things with those people, and actually a lot of people came. 

I don't think Christians go sit down in Mosques and debate in a friendly way very often, ha.
But it was really tough and a little discouraging because we didn't really get anywhere except to disagree. 

But hopefully some of the questions we raised planted some seeds of truth in their hearts, especially the younger kids there.

And before we left the Imam was like if the Holy Ghost is real, I want him, and more than anything else I pray that Allah will reveal the truth of these things. 

We were like, well alright keep praying that man, because He will!

And one girl with us was amazingly bold and said - in the mosque - 'I just want you to know, Jesus died for you and you and you and He loves you.' and everyone was just like .......gasp. I felt SO awkward and the Imam was like 'He didn't die but thank you.' 

Even though it was so tense in that moment I was so proud of her for saying that. There is so much power in just those words and that may be the only time those men and young boys ever hear those words in their lives.

I took some photos, possible the best I've ever taken, even some of the Imam, and when I got home I saw that the mirror inside my film camera was crooked... possibly making all the pictures I took completely blank. But I still haven't developed them so pray God will do a miracle with those photos.  
I took some of these muslim german boys that were like 9 or 10 and they like huddled and talked after I took it. One of the german girls told me that one of the boys was like 'She came all the way from America and took a picture of ME!' Man, so cute. 

Right after that we went to another city-and went to a meeting of muslim women hanging out. It was really hard too. One girl decided to accept Allah as her god and submit to him or whatever they call converting to Islam. And we were just sitting there while she said the prayer and I didn't know what to do- we just prayed in our hearts. Crazy.

Please pray that I can have boldness and courage to speak God's truth in these places. Its really easy for me to be intimidated and not say anything. Pray that God will use us being there to bring His presence to these really empty places. 

And right now both of my cameras aren't working... Please pray for that too.

Yeah

So I can't talk about outreach locations on the internet, I found out. For the best though.

I turned in the magical sheet of paper with my top three choices and now its up to God and the DTS staff to put me where I'm supposed to be. 

Everyday I have more questions for God. Everyday a new one gets answered. :-)

We bought our tickets to Romania this week. Taking the train to Budapest, Hungary and staying there for a night, then driving up to Romania. Maybe a pit stop in Transylvania....oooooh.

like Fireworks

I really don't like seminars. or writing mission statements for my life. 

or not having time to take pictures. 

But I do like black tea.

I found out I'm going to Romania for a week in November, huzzah! We're hopefully going to an orphanage. I'm so excited. Please pray for my team and for what God has for us there. 

My digital camera lens broke... Thats really bad. If you know of anyone who is selling a Canon lens of any sort, any condition, please let me know. 

Aaaand I sent out my first newsletter- if you didn't get one let me know and I'll e-mail it to you.

or just e-mail me now. 

sailboatescape@gmail.com

My Life; part 1

1111!!Oiuhie u

Finally got some prints scanned!

I love it here. I have hard days, but as a whole this is one of the greatest times of my entire life. I can't ever be thankful enough that I am here.

The staff is incredible, man. I wish the Schlegels could adopt the whole photo dts and we could be a traveling missionary photographer family and live in tents in Africa and have underground darkrooms and start a revolution of love.

Prague

I like that place

Yes yes yes

19 years old. :-)




I've been here 40 days today, wow.

Dear Earthlings

Hahaha this would be happening on my birthday-

AWAKE DEAR ONES INTO THE LIGHT OF YOURSELVES.

October 14, 2008- Alien Visitation
According to 'Direct Voice Channelling Medium' Blossom Goodchild, On October 14, 2008, a large alien craft will appear in our skies over the southern hemisphere for a period of 3 days. Goodchild calls these cosmic beings The Federation of Light and has stated that "that they come in LOVE to help us and our planet move to a new Higher Vibration of Love."

News Article: 
Dozens of very influential UFO researchers and psychics have all set October 14 as the date when a massive spaceship seen by millions would show up and stay in Earth's atmosphere for more than two days. The people who claim to be in contact with these aliens say the extra terrestrial's aim is to prove to the humans that they have brothers and sisters outside of Earth who look just like them, thus putting an end to more than 2 thousands years of religious, historical and scientific manipulation of earth governments over people.

So guys, be vigilant. Keep your eyes to the skies.

I love you Heather.

THANKS

Friends are people who send you pirate and dinosaur tattoos when you move to another country.

Best present ever.

oh and this is good-

Worship Dance Parties

Best thing ever

Engraved on the Palm of His Hands

I just came upstairs from our first regular dts class.

To sum it up- 

I sat on the floor, weeping, crying louder than I ever have before tears of brokenness and healing.

People prayed for me and each other, some of them fell to ground, some laughed.

God began healing me in places I had pushed so deep inside of myself that I didn't even realize had been hurting for so long. 

I can hear Him again. I want so much more. 

This verse came to me from two separate times this morning and it has some of the most beautiful words I've ever been told-

"I will not forget you. 

See, I have engraved you on the palm of my hands." Isaiah 49:16

What God showed me, was that to hear Him, I have to be honest with Him... and myself.

I had to be okay with saying, 

God I don't know if I love you.

But what I do know is that I want to.

God I'm not happy with my life. I wish I was making a difference. I wish I trusted you.

But I know you can help me to know you- to trust you,

I know you can use me to make a difference in the world. But first I need you to heal me, and to show me who I am. 

He changed my heart because I finally showed it to Him and I am falling in love with Him again.

Oh and on my way upstairs to write this- there was something in my mailbox.

The Ordinary Radicals movie. 

:-) :-) :-)

?

YWAM= Young Women After Men?

jklol

but seriously

Opened

I guess I'm supposed to give up things I hold onto too tightly. Even if they're just unreachable expectations or dreams that come in the way.

All the new kids got here today. Change is good.

I'm excited for the next three months.

Psalm 138:8

The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me;

your love, O Lord, endures forever-

do not abandon the works of your hands.

Shiza

How am I ever supposed to heal if the scabs keep getting ripped off my wounds?

I wish I could just not like people. Then it wouldn't hurt me so bad. 

Some Things I Didn't Expect

Things I never expected...

- That Jan Schlegel (Pronounced Yann Shlaygul) would look exactly like Chris Farley...

- That I'd be in a dark room till 3 AM most days

- That Shiza is not really a cuss word, just really fun to say ALL the time.

- That I would get to witness a purple exercise ball being thrown out of a castle window.

- That I would actually be excited about coming home in April. I already can't wait.

- Velvet couches.

- That I would meet the most frustrating people I've ever encountered. Along with the most beautiful and fantastic.

- That I would see such prevalent racism still existing. East Germany still has a lot of Nazis and its really so spiritually dark in some of these towns. Germany is such a beautiful, sad country. Its like the most beautiful woman you've ever seen with huge sad eyes. You can tell the people, the towns have seen so many sad and terrible things. But God brings beauty and restoration and its so incredible to witness.

- That an ocean apart is really. far.

- That you can seriously take a dance party anywhere you can think of.

- That I would wake up and hate where I am.

- That I would wake up and I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

- That I would be taking cross-country roadtrips through Germany, 

meeting people who are lost and people who are shining, 

and sleeping on church floors as I go. 

God has bigger dreams than I could ever imagine. 

Hot Dang!

Thanks Shane Claiborne!

and Dad :-)

Mmm Whatcha Say

Just got back from the largest photofair in Germany - The Photokina. 

 (in Cologne, Germany)

It was beastly.

Especially the Lomography section.

Just chillin at the Lomo Lounge, 

checkin the Lomo Wall

Lomo people; Lomo life.

Hope sometime I can have a career as a 

Lomo World Documentary Photographer/Psychological Analyst.

That would be good.

Dream You

Had a hard weekend, but came out even better for it.

God's teaching me to be honest... and patient. And a lovely girl told me earlier this week that there's comfort in having absolutely no control. I'm finding that to be true.
Being honest with myself is the hardest thing of all.

This is a good place.

Yarghhh

Hot dang I've never had such a hard time getting along with people....

Dresden Trip

Yesterday when we were in Dresden, we passed a really old lady fallen on the ground, shaking like she was having a seizure or something. She wasn't from Germany, maybe spain or italy or something, but she couldn't speak german or english.
Some other old german ladies stopped and tried to help her up, but she just held out her cup for money.
We were like man that sucks- who knows if she really needs help, she probably just wants money.
But I couldn't keep walking.. I felt sick inside to just walk by her. All these verses were going through my head... what you do to the least of these, you do unto me... good samaritan... the beggar at the wall, Peter said money i don't have, but the love and power of Jesus...
And so we talked about it, some of the girls were like she's probably there everyday, she just wants money, she wouldn't even let those ladies help her up... But I looked over there and a bunch of german teenagers were standing right in front of her laughing at her.
I was like we can at least go pray for her, and everyone agreed. We went over there and she held out her cup for money and a few of us stuck some change in it, but we put our arms around her and started praying- that God would help her to not feel alone, that He would let her know that He knows every part of her story, He's always been with her and he loves her.
She started crying really hard, we couldn't see her face because it was right next to the ground, but she kept wiping her sleeve and it was wetter and wetter everytime. She lifted up her sleeve and she had a bracelet with a rosary of mary and jesus and she pointed to it. It was an amazing moment. I started trying to lift her up, and she held out the cup again, but i ignored it and we all started lifting her up. We took to her to one of the walls of a building close by that she could lean against and she kept crying and crying, and we just held her hand and rubbed her back. She pointed to the bracelet again, and I pointed to it and then to her heart. She nodded yes and i pointed to my heart. Then she started kissing all of our hands and most of us were crying at that point. She held out her hand with a 2 euro coin in it and we all said no no! And then she hugged us. She never looked at us in the eyes though.
I feel like that was a moment I won't ever forget. Haha, shane claiborne moment. I hope we just made her feel like she was worth something again, that us stopping and caring about her meant something to her, and that she felt like God loves her. :-)
Sorry that was so long...dang.

Witness

I'm writing a report on war photographer James Nachtwey- he has incredible pictures^ and unbelievable stories. This picture is of a man in Rwanda who survived a Hutu death camp in 1994. Reading about James Nachtwey's life inspired me so much- he dedicated and risked his life to take pictures that would make people aware of what is going on in the world and to bring change. I have to give a report about him in a couple weeks in front of everyone... ahh scary... but at least he's awesome.

We started making pinhole cameras yesterday. I made mine out of a hairdye box... haha. So far not so good at taking pictures.... but it looks awesome. Hopefully I can put up a picture of it soon. 

Also I got to use the dark room for the first time today! That was really exciting. 

I have a friend here from Switzerland named Gandalf. Thats also exciting.

I can't believe I've only been here a week.

I'm too tired to think of anything clever to say, but hopefully I can put up a nice fat post soon.

I miss you guys!

Like No Other

Our inspiration for today:

Go Sony... and Jose Gonzalez

We watched this and the making of this commercial in our photo class.

Highfive for thinking outside of the box and for using real bouncy balls.

You are my perfect rhyme

Incredible worship night tonight. I feel so free at this place.

Its so humbling to look around you at a circle of people worshipping God and know that each one of them was handpicked to be right there, at that very moment, and you are one of them.
I mean, its true of every place you go when you think about it, but at such a random far away place you become really aware of God picking you up and placing you exactly where He wants you.

I'm really missing everyone right now, though. It sucks to have so many people with pieces of my heart so far away.

I was afraid I wouldn't be able to give a lot in this trip, you know, knowing that I'm leaving and not wanting to get really close to people- all my trust issue fun stuff. Especially because the one place I invested pretty much my entire social life in highschool kind of left me alone in the hardest part of leaving, when I really needed them the most. But I think God was preparing my heart for some big things this year, and going through that helped me grow up a lot. The YWAM staff wrote me a letter and said they prayed for me before I got here, and they said God told them He was going to help me 'sort out the trash in my life' while I'm here. I hope thats a good thing.
And the dream synopsis Joel wrote of the crazy dream I just have left me with a lot to think about along those lines. Weird things and good things going on.

ADDRESS

Joanna Branson
JMEM / DTS
Untere Dorfstr. 56
02747 Ruppersdorf, Germany

Wilkommen

Why does every German word look like the name of a beer?

I made it, after

three hours of plane delays, one and a half of which spent sitting in the plane with no air conditioning,

two trains without a single person who speaks english, and several naps in the airport. 

This is what the train stations look like. Germany is full of fantastic old buildings. 

While we were there, no one spoke. It was completely silent waiting for the trains. I loved it.

The Water Castle isn't what I expected, but its just as wonderful. Its not like a stone castle with dungeons/chambers/moats, its more like an enormous cottage with hundreds of windows and gardens and five stories. It has a nice cold basement complete with food rooms and a dark room (yay!) and right outside my window is the stone bridge leading up to it, and some goats that yell at me in the morning. 

When we were driving from the train station, we passed a huge field of windmills right next to the base. So amazing. I'm sure I'll be putting up pictures of it soon. 

Its a little awkward right now, there's only seven students here. But everyone gets here Saturday! I already feel at home at this place. Thank you God for bringing me here.

Right now I'm sitting at my laptop, listening to one of the YWAM staff mopping the staircase, singing worship hymns to God that are echoing throughout all four floors and I am so excited for the next seven months. 

No need to say goodbye

I'll be back before you know it. 

Mix tape #1 - See Ya Later

1. Scatterbrain (As Dead As Leaves) - Radiohead

2. Boats and Birds - Gregory and the Hawk

3. Raindrops - Regina Spektor

4. I'm Yours - Jason Mraz

5. The Old Days - Dr. Dog

6. Grace - Phil Wickham

7. The Call - Regina Spektor

8. This Will Be Our Year - Ok Go

9. Transatlanticism - Death Cab For Cutie

10. Kingdom Come - Coldplay

11. Last Time Here - The Album Leaf

12. The End Has No End - The Strokes

High five to Rachael D, Kristina, and Lizzie for coming to my house and giving me the best going-away presents ever. 

Bonus high five to Heather for being the last person I'll ever text from my phone and for being the inspiration of 3 or more songs on the Mix #1. 

This is going to be an amazing seven months. The hardest part of all was tonight. 

Thank you God for this chance. Thank you God for Nicky Hackett. Thank you God for providing everything I need to follow my dreams, the ones you painted on my heart yourself. 

Just because everything's changing

doesn't mean its never been this way before.

I'll come back when you call me, 

No need to say goodbye.